Monday, 22 December 2014

Teenage Blues

"TEENAGE", this word itself, gives parents the nightmare or to put it differently the goose pimples. If we introspect ourselves, we will come to the conclusion that at some point of time, we also experienced the same things as, our children are experiencing now. In fact, everyone has to go through this stage.
Then why such a hue and cry about it ? It is the tendency, of every human being to be skeptical about a change.
Change, is never acceptable to any of us irrespective of the place, country we live in.

Then how such a big change in our children would be accepted by us? Which unfortunately is true, as TEENAGE, implies change - A physical change and a mental change.
This is the most difficult phase in everyone's life as, a child is on the verge of becoming an adult, leaving behind his childhood.
It is the most sensitive phase which should be handled with great care and compassion. Teenage, can well be compared with mirror.If handled with care, will reflect the sweet memories when the child looks back, if not, would break and always leave the scars behind.
Therefore it becomes the responsibility of parents and adults like, grand parents in the family to handle teenagers tactfully.

Teenagers suffer from the typical symptoms like: 1) Do not pay attention to what you are saying.
2) Always in an irritated mood and think that they are always right.
3) Prove there points and become arrogant.
4) Do not like the company of family members. 5) The importance of friends in their lives increase to such an extent, that they pick up fights with the parents for them.
The above list is, only illustrative and not exhaustive. The best way to cope up with Teenage Blues is: 1) To become an active listener to them.

2) To first understand their concerns.

3) Not to treat their friends as their enemies. They need friends at this stage of their lives.
4) Be their friend, confidant, and a troubleshooter as well.

5) Don't set rules for them without giving them reasons for it. Tell them the consequences of not following the rules.
6) Have faith in them.

7) Give them some work and responsibility for it as well. 8) If you tell them not to do certain things, give them reasons for it and remember, they are not small children any more, who will listen to you without expecting, the logical answer from you. 9) If they question you on certain things, don't feel offended as they now, want reasons for all the things. They will not accept your orders as it is.

10) They should know about your teenage days too, and how you behaved with your parents.
What mistakes you had made and how you had rectified them. Who else is going to do the honors, but none other than the grand parents! 11) If the grand parents are their, in the house then it is nothing like it as some children open up very easily with the grandparents.

12) Sometimes grand parents act like a link between the parents and the grand children.

In short, what I want to say is: TEENAGERS today, are the most misunderstood class all over the world.

It is the responsibility, of adults in the family to understand them as they are more experienced and mature to handle them. Proactiveness, of adults is very important when the behavior of a child changes.
Enjoy this stage of your children as, they are making themselves ready to face new challenges of the outside world.
If you can enjoy the first step, first words of your toddlers then don't forget that, this is also the first step of your same toddler, who now, wants to take the big leap to take on the whole new world outside.

Instead of accusing, stand firmly behind them as a friend, guide and support them to take the big step.
Give them your hand when they need it.
Always watch your actions as, children right from the beginning learn every thing by watching you. If your behavior does not match with your actions, then they will not respect you and will not listen to you. The most important thing is, always show lots of love and compassion towards them. Be strict but not rude.

And please don't take them to the doctors, counselors or Psychiatrists as, who else, can understand your child better than you.

Take full responsibility of your children.
Imbibe good values in them from the beginning. These values and your good actions, definitely get registered at the back of their minds.

Even if, their behavior, is not good now, but once this stage passes they will definitely become good human beings with good moral values. Always remember, Teenage is a changing phase and every change has to change, accept this change and take full responsibility to make this change happen in a positive manner, to see how they become good citizens and good human beings.

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